Well for another couple of weeks anyway! If there is anyone checking in regularly still (apart from my parents!) you will have noticed a distinct lack of activity here of late - well I've had 4 assignments to write in 3 weeks, plus being prompt for the local Amature Dramatic's plays and so much relieving at Kindy this last week that I'm remembering (again) why I have no long term plans to work full time if I can possibly avoid it... talk about burning the candle at both ends!
So, no visitors this weekend (I'm hoping Em & Chris have decided camping in this weather is a bad idea and have found somewhere more substantial to sleep!), so far no small boys to look after, no homework to do (well I could start reading next semester's stuff which arrived yesterday but there is such a thing as being over-keen).... It all feels very strange being at a loose end again, I'd almost forgotten what days like this were like!
As it's raining cats, dogs and stair-rods (but still no men) again, complete with thunder storms, an inside day is on the cards methinks. Woodstove, cuppa, good book.... sounding good to me! But I guess I ought to catch up on some housework first, got to feel as though I've done something constructive with my day afterall!!
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Thursday, June 12, 2008
my late afternoon routine
Bring in the washing before it starts getting damp again
Feed the chooks, before it gets dark and they go to sleep
Collect the eggs
Pick up the windfall fruit
Pick veges* for tea from the garden
Fill up the firewood basket, whilst it's still light enough to spot lurking wetas in the log pile
Bring in some cryptomaria for kindling if the box is empty
Round up the dog who has usually gone awol sometime during the above....
Cook tea
*kiwi english spelling!
Another day in paradise....
Feed the chooks, before it gets dark and they go to sleep
Collect the eggs
Pick up the windfall fruit
Pick veges* for tea from the garden
Fill up the firewood basket, whilst it's still light enough to spot lurking wetas in the log pile
Bring in some cryptomaria for kindling if the box is empty
Round up the dog who has usually gone awol sometime during the above....
Cook tea
*kiwi english spelling!
Another day in paradise....
Friday, May 23, 2008
it's dark, and I'm wearing sunglasses...
....nowhere to be by morning though.
I've been wearing sunglasses for about a week now. It's the only way I can cope with the world right now. I've had viral conjunctivitis - 'pink eye'. And if you are wondering what that looks like, well let's just say they weren't up all night thinking of a name for it. What it doesn't describe is the swollen eyelids, the crusty 'sleep', infuriating itching, photosensitivity (and no I didn't want my picture taken either) and thumping headaches.
I hadn't really appreciated how much I used my eyes until I couldn't. All my usual curl up and feel sorry for myself past times were out - reading, films and of course the computer. I managed to sew all the pieces I had cut out already for the next quilt but ground to a halt when it came to cutting more cloth - I'd already sliced two fingers peeling pumpkin and the thought of weilding a rotary cutter when I couldn't quite see what I was doing... well blood doesn't wash off cotton as well as pumpkin so I gave that a miss.
I've spent a lot of time thinking about those I knew who have been losing their sight, no matter how frustrating this last week has been for me at least I knew it would all clear up again. How would I adapt if this was permanent? What would I find to do to pass the time?! I guess I'd get used to it and gain more confident within my limitations eventually but it's scary how debilitating it has felt. I'm not sure if it has filled me with more admiration for those I know who cycle or drive with poor sight or whether it now scares me even more to think of them out there on the roads!!!
I've been wearing sunglasses for about a week now. It's the only way I can cope with the world right now. I've had viral conjunctivitis - 'pink eye'. And if you are wondering what that looks like, well let's just say they weren't up all night thinking of a name for it. What it doesn't describe is the swollen eyelids, the crusty 'sleep', infuriating itching, photosensitivity (and no I didn't want my picture taken either) and thumping headaches.
I hadn't really appreciated how much I used my eyes until I couldn't. All my usual curl up and feel sorry for myself past times were out - reading, films and of course the computer. I managed to sew all the pieces I had cut out already for the next quilt but ground to a halt when it came to cutting more cloth - I'd already sliced two fingers peeling pumpkin and the thought of weilding a rotary cutter when I couldn't quite see what I was doing... well blood doesn't wash off cotton as well as pumpkin so I gave that a miss.
I've spent a lot of time thinking about those I knew who have been losing their sight, no matter how frustrating this last week has been for me at least I knew it would all clear up again. How would I adapt if this was permanent? What would I find to do to pass the time?! I guess I'd get used to it and gain more confident within my limitations eventually but it's scary how debilitating it has felt. I'm not sure if it has filled me with more admiration for those I know who cycle or drive with poor sight or whether it now scares me even more to think of them out there on the roads!!!
Monday, May 12, 2008
wedding
My brother Jon gets married in a few hours time - hopefully I'll sleep through the ceremony but I expect I'll be awake for the reception.
Not that I'll be there, I'll be tucked up in bed on the other side of the world and then getting up ready to go to my early childhood teaching placement. Thanks Leo & Aunty Meg for filling in for me =)
It feels a bit surreal really - they've been together so long now (over a decade) that it's not like anyone new is joining the family, Rachel already is family. So much so that I've got forgetting her birthday down the same fine art as I have with everyone else... well not so much the forgetting it per se as forgetting to do anything about it in time - even harder now I've got to allow for an extra 6 days postage!
I'm sad I can't be there with them. But I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles and it's not exactly the first wedding I would have loved to be at that I've missed by having moved to the opposite side of the world either and won't be the only one this year. As the saying goes - you make your bed, you have to lie in it.... which right now seems like a rather good idea! Time for sleep methinks.
And when I wake up my brother will be a married man. Weird.....
Not that I'll be there, I'll be tucked up in bed on the other side of the world and then getting up ready to go to my early childhood teaching placement. Thanks Leo & Aunty Meg for filling in for me =)
It feels a bit surreal really - they've been together so long now (over a decade) that it's not like anyone new is joining the family, Rachel already is family. So much so that I've got forgetting her birthday down the same fine art as I have with everyone else... well not so much the forgetting it per se as forgetting to do anything about it in time - even harder now I've got to allow for an extra 6 days postage!
I'm sad I can't be there with them. But I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles and it's not exactly the first wedding I would have loved to be at that I've missed by having moved to the opposite side of the world either and won't be the only one this year. As the saying goes - you make your bed, you have to lie in it.... which right now seems like a rather good idea! Time for sleep methinks.
And when I wake up my brother will be a married man. Weird.....
Monday, April 28, 2008
remembering Dean
It doesn't feel like it was over 24yrs ago. The memories are still vivid. The stunned silence of the classroom and muted reaction. The quiet tears. The empty desk.
The disbelief. He couldn't have died, he was in school last week.
The anger - that HRI needed to hold jumble sales and cake stalls to raise funds for a bodyscanner that could have spotted what was wrong and thus saved his life whilst Maggie spent several fortunes on nuclear weapons that could never be used and cut back on NHS expenditure to do so.
The indignation - when the vicar at the carol service kept going on and on about it and then expected the school brass band behind him, which included Dean's teammates and classmates, to play - as if his lengthy ponderings had been the usual Christmas offering.
The feeling of helplessness - wanting to reach out to those classmates who knew him far better than I but never knowing how to do so or what to say.
The incredible response at school - the collection box outside Barson's office raised over two hundred pounds, not bad for school kids in 1983, especially considering Dean had only been with us for a few months.
The gratitude - to Liverpool Football Club for the wreath. He'd died from a football injury. It meant a lot to us.
The sense of loss - of someone I'd only just been getting to know but had instantly liked.
And now?
I don't think I've ever quite forgiven that vicar. We only just had enough tissues between us in the choir. It isn't easy singing when you've been crying, and the haunting picture of Stephen's tears has always remained with me.
I can forgive the hospital staff who sent him home thinking he was ok, they did the best with what they had. But it was a wake up call to the realities of politics for me - it wasn't just something on the news any more - it was personal.Cut-backs in health service budgets still send a chill down my spine.
I can't forget. The grief has never really gone away. Every teenager's death brings it back.
Quite who the tears are for now I'm not sure, whether it's for Dean, his friends and family, or those newly grieving, my thoughts are with them - family, friends and classmates.
The disbelief. He couldn't have died, he was in school last week.
The anger - that HRI needed to hold jumble sales and cake stalls to raise funds for a bodyscanner that could have spotted what was wrong and thus saved his life whilst Maggie spent several fortunes on nuclear weapons that could never be used and cut back on NHS expenditure to do so.
The indignation - when the vicar at the carol service kept going on and on about it and then expected the school brass band behind him, which included Dean's teammates and classmates, to play - as if his lengthy ponderings had been the usual Christmas offering.
The feeling of helplessness - wanting to reach out to those classmates who knew him far better than I but never knowing how to do so or what to say.
The incredible response at school - the collection box outside Barson's office raised over two hundred pounds, not bad for school kids in 1983, especially considering Dean had only been with us for a few months.
The gratitude - to Liverpool Football Club for the wreath. He'd died from a football injury. It meant a lot to us.
The sense of loss - of someone I'd only just been getting to know but had instantly liked.
And now?
I don't think I've ever quite forgiven that vicar. We only just had enough tissues between us in the choir. It isn't easy singing when you've been crying, and the haunting picture of Stephen's tears has always remained with me.
I can forgive the hospital staff who sent him home thinking he was ok, they did the best with what they had. But it was a wake up call to the realities of politics for me - it wasn't just something on the news any more - it was personal.Cut-backs in health service budgets still send a chill down my spine.
I can't forget. The grief has never really gone away. Every teenager's death brings it back.
Quite who the tears are for now I'm not sure, whether it's for Dean, his friends and family, or those newly grieving, my thoughts are with them - family, friends and classmates.
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