Friday, May 23, 2008

it's dark, and I'm wearing sunglasses...

....nowhere to be by morning though.

I've been wearing sunglasses for about a week now. It's the only way I can cope with the world right now. I've had viral conjunctivitis - 'pink eye'. And if you are wondering what that looks like, well let's just say they weren't up all night thinking of a name for it. What it doesn't describe is the swollen eyelids, the crusty 'sleep', infuriating itching, photosensitivity (and no I didn't want my picture taken either) and thumping headaches.

I hadn't really appreciated how much I used my eyes until I couldn't. All my usual curl up and feel sorry for myself past times were out - reading, films and of course the computer. I managed to sew all the pieces I had cut out already for the next quilt but ground to a halt when it came to cutting more cloth - I'd already sliced two fingers peeling pumpkin and the thought of weilding a rotary cutter when I couldn't quite see what I was doing... well blood doesn't wash off cotton as well as pumpkin so I gave that a miss.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about those I knew who have been losing their sight, no matter how frustrating this last week has been for me at least I knew it would all clear up again. How would I adapt if this was permanent? What would I find to do to pass the time?! I guess I'd get used to it and gain more confident within my limitations eventually but it's scary how debilitating it has felt. I'm not sure if it has filled me with more admiration for those I know who cycle or drive with poor sight or whether it now scares me even more to think of them out there on the roads!!!

1 comment:

pete said...

Glad to hear you didn't get blood on your quilt. Perhaps it's time for a well-earned rest. Look after yourself. As part of "ageing" gracefully, I have a list of things I'm going to do as the various parts of my body give out. When my legs stop working, I'm getting a motorised red wheelchair with flames painted on it. When my arms give out as well, I'll sit and watch the grass grow, and when my eyes have had it, I'll get one of those machines that automatically makes tea in the morning and turns the radio on. In the in-between times, though, I'll make the most of what I do have. It's never too late to better than ever. Here 'till the last breath, "We're on a mission from God."