making progress

The last couple of days have been so different to the last couple of months. On Friday I saw my GP and my medication changed yet again in an attempt to get on top of the headaches. The last few weeks have seen a shift from no energy of the 'I've just had 'flu' for a month' type to the 'I haven't slept for a month' variety, in other words no longer weak and wobbly, just exhausted and tiring further very easily.

The not having slept bit isn't actually that far off, due to prolific hot flushes/night sweats I've had great difficulty getting to sleep, and then once asleep being woken every hour or so until morning. And broken sleep does not a happy Anna make. It's no wonder really that I keep crashing out for an hour or so during the day to try to catch up.

Whilst the underlying issue seems to be gynaecological my main concern for the short term was to get on top of the headaches, then at least I could function properly when I was awake. The feeling of thinking through a fog and feeling as though I was constantly on the verge of a migraine was getting me down. Hence the change of medication, which is simply double the dose of something I already take for my arthritis.

Saturday felt a bit better, I got quite a few emails done and wrote most of a report. Sunday I managed to proof read some Friend Newsletter articles and really make inroads into the backlog of 'must get around to' emails that had been building up in an ever increasing guilt pile, and today I managed to read a substantial chunk of  the YM Documents in Advance on top of getting other things done! What a difference, the first time I've been able to sit down and read anything for longer than about 5 mins in two months - I feel as though I've finally started to get my life back.

My head is still sore but more bearable, I can't cope with movement very well still as 10 mins pottering around the garden after hanging out the washing proved, but I can think straight and my eyes don't feel like they are boring into the back of my head when I read anything. My stomach still aches when the painkillers wear off, and is tender at all times. I still look like I'm about 4-5mths pregnant and can't even do up my trousers any more even if I wanted to put up with the discomfort of them being tight, yet my weight has hardly changed. And yes, I do still tire very easily, I got a bit carried away with feeling so much better today that by 3pm I was worn out and back to lying on my bed listening to an audio book. But there is progress, even if I have to sit still to make the most of it.

Due to a communication breakdown I'm back to square one with a referral to a specialist so it's back to the GP again this week. Maybe the blood tests I had done on Friday will show something useful, but with my track record so far this year I'm not holding my breath! There is a bit of a feeling of two steps forward, one step back about it all, but if I can read and write/type for decent lengths of time again then I can cope with the delays. I'm back on known ground and my usual coping strategies can kick in again. I might even feel up to getting the sewing machine back out now I'm not so muddle headed and there's less chance of me sewing through my fingers (yes, I've done that before when overtired, and I really don't want to do it again).

There is light at the end of the tunnel, and hopefully it isn't the oncoming train...